(Photos) The Truth To Why Jon Left Kate Finally Comes Out And It’s No Surprise To Anyone: "

Finally, after all the speculation, rumors and innuendo, the truth finally comes out and it’s no surprise to anyone. Despite rumors of Jon’s infidelity, which may or may not be true, (actually, didn’t he admit to being unfaithful?) new evidence has surfaced which clearly explains Jon and Kate’s breakup. For a hint, see the photos below. Now I’m no rocket scientist, but if I had Kate’s mug screeching at me all day long, I think I’d look for the nearest escape hatch too. I mean, Kate came across a little controlling and rough around the edges on the show, but really sweetheart, take a break. Breathe in, breathe out. In Kate’s defense though, Jon’s no Dapper Don. I realize he’s a reality show superstar and all, but geeish dude, get out and walk around the block once in awhile. And what’s up with the hairdo? Is it some new Asian wind-tunnel style? It looks like some sort of  Exxon Valdez meet Harry the peacock. I guess on movie night with the kids they’d just stay home and use his forehead for a screen. The sunglasses–those must be to keep the paparazzi camera flash from burning his retinas. I’ve seen smaller sunglasses on old blind women.

I really shouldn’t be that tough on ‘ole Jon though. Now that I think about it, he does have to stay at home all the time with those 8 adorable kids (trust me, they’ll be trolls someday) and that 22 year old nanny of his. Meanwhile, his ex-wife hoofs around the country hawking those How To Be A Good Mother books of hers with that hot looking 53 year old security guard. And I didn’t even say anything about that 1975 Dorothy Hamill haircut of hers. Of course, nobody said life would be easy raising 8 kids. <Sigh>, now where did I go wrong….?